Ramadan Tips For Parents

Early Memories of Ramadan

Growing up, Ramadan held a special place in my heart. When my dad would come home and announce the sighting of the moon, it marked the beginning of the holy month. As a child, this announcement meant a shift in our routine: our parents, who were usually upset when we didn’t eat our food, suddenly encouraged us to abstain from eating or drinking during the day. For thirty days, we fasted, and after sunset, we would head to the masjid to break our fast and pray Taraweeh, a time of joy and excitement. Special foods were prepared by my mother, and the house was decorated for the occasion. Some of the foods included bara, cassava pone, beef patties and channa. The culmination of Ramadan was Eid, which for us children meant an abundance of food, family gatherings, fun, and gifts. These memories are etched in my heart.

However, as I grew older and became a parent, my perspective on Ramadan changed. The month of Ramadan transformed into a time of hard work, schedule changes, and managing multiple responsibilities. It became clear to me that for Ramadan to be truly successful for our family, we needed detailed planning. I realized that Ramadan was not only an obligation but also a golden opportunity for spiritual growth and renewal.

Ramadan: Obligation and Opportunity

The Obligation of Fasting

Ramadan is an obligatory act for Muslims, as stated in the Qur’an (Surah 2, Verse 183): “O you who believe! Fasting is prescribed for you as it was prescribed for those before you, that you may attain taqwa (piety).” In addition, fasting is one of the Five Pillars of Islam, as mentioned in the Hadith: “Islam is built on five pillars: testimony of faith, prayer, charity, pilgrimage, and fasting in Ramadan” (Bukhari & Muslim). These obligations remind us of our duty to fast during Ramadan, with the aim of strengthening our relationship with Allah.

The Opportunities in Ramadan

Ramadan is not just an obligatory act; it is a month filled with immense opportunities to grow spiritually and seek forgiveness. Some of the key opportunities include:

• Allah forgives past sins of the one who fasts sincerely.
• Devils are chained down, and the gates of heaven are open.
• The gates of hell are closed.
• Every night, Allah frees some of His servants from punishment.
• Allah answers the du’a (supplications) of the fasting person at the time of Iftar.
• Rewards for good deeds are multiplied.
• Laylatul Qadr (the Night of Decree), which is better than a thousand months, falls during Ramadan.
• A chance to renew our connection with the Qur’an and seek salvation from the Hellfire.

For us as parents, the key to making the most of these opportunities is planning ahead for Ramadan.

Planning for Ramadan

Preparation Before Ramadan

The best way to benefit from Ramadan is by preparing for it in advance. Here are some essential steps to take before the month arrives:

1. Intention: Set a sincere intention to please Allah in all actions during Ramadan, and strive to make it the best Ramadan yet.
2. Job Preparation: Arrange for time off work, especially on Fridays for Jum’ah prayer, and try to lighten your workload in advance.
3. Medical Preparation: Visit your doctor for a check-up, especially if you have any health concerns that could affect your fasting.
4. Worship Preparation: Begin fasting some days in the month of Sha’ban, increase Qur’an recitation, and engage in more dhikr and prayers.
5. Relationship Preparation: Forgive others, seek forgiveness from those you may have wronged, and clear any conflicts.
6. Ramadan Goals: Set clear personal and family goals for worship, such as completing Qur’an recitation or improving salah.
7. Shopping Preparation: Buy groceries, ‘Eid gifts, and any items needed for Ramadan in advance to avoid last-minute stress.
8. Zakaah Preparation: Calculate and prepare your Zakaah and Sadaqatul Fitr (charitable donations) in advance.
9. Home Preparation: Clean and decorate the house, prepare a prayer area, and reduce distractions like TV and social media to focus on worship.

Ramadan Activities

Once Ramadan arrives, it’s time to implement the plans and engage in worship and activities that will help you maximize the benefits of the month. Here are some activities to consider:

1. Fasting: For adults and those without health concerns, fasting is obligatory. Children can gradually be introduced to fasting by allowing them to fast for a few hours or part of the day.
2. Involving Children: Make Ramadan fun and educational for children. Create a fasting calendar, let them participate in preparing food, and reward them for good deeds.
3. Khidmah (Serving Others): Ramadan is an ideal time for acts of charity and serving others. Volunteer at the masjid, help the elderly, or donate to Iftar programs.
4. Qur’an Interaction: Set goals for Qur’an recitation and reflection. Consider memorizing a few verses or reading the translation to better understand the message.
5. Salah (Prayers): Attend Taraweeh prayers at the masjid if possible, and engage in additional prayers at home.
6. Spiritual Growth: Focus on improving your character during Ramadan—be more patient, smiling, and helpful. Reflect on Allah’s blessings and express gratitude.
7. Islamic Knowledge: Spend time reading Islamic books, Hadith collections, or learning about the life of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) to deepen your understanding of Islam.
8. Du’a (Supplications): Make frequent du’a during Ramadan, especially at Iftar time, as this is a blessed time when Allah answers the supplications of the fasting person.
9. I’tikaaf: Seek to engage in I’tikaaf (spiritual retreat) during the last ten days of Ramadan, particularly to seek Laylatul Qadr.
10. Zakaah: Ramadan is the perfect time to pay your Zakaah and fulfill your obligations toward those in need.

After Ramadan: Evaluation and Reflection

Once Ramadan concludes with the celebration of Eid, it’s important to take time as a family to reflect on the month. Discuss what went well, such as who fasted the most or who attended the masjid regularly. This reflection should lead to a commitment to continue the positive habits cultivated during Ramadan. A common practice is to fast the six days of Shawwal, which is highly recommended and brings further reward.

In our family, the goal is to make Ramadan memorable for our children. If we have planned well and engaged in meaningful worship, our children will remember Ramadan as a time of spiritual renewal, family bonding, and joyous celebrations. Insha’Allah, they will look forward to Ramadan each year with excitement and anticipation.

Conclusion

For those who grew up in the Caribbean with its own unique Muslim cultural norms, Ramadan represented a time of profound spiritual reflection, a chance to improve our relationship with Allah, and a period of immense reward. Through careful planning, we can ensure that we maximize the opportunities Ramadan offers, both for ourselves and our families. By focusing on worship, charity, and personal development, Ramadan can become a transformative experience, shaping our lives for the better and bringing us closer to Allah.